The day after Bawbag

If there is one trait that the Scots have as a nation is our ability not to take things too seriously….even hurricane force winds are no match for the Scots sense of humour, as was demonstrated on Thursday when 162mph winds ripped over The Cairngorm, Scotland’s second highest mountain, 80 mph winds ripped over the western island of Tiree. All the major bridges were closed to all traffic, the Met Office issued a Red Warning, for the first time since the system was started and what did the winds become known as?

Hurricane Bawbag*, that’s what!

Here is two postings from Facebook

Hurricane Bawbag – 8/12/11
The day Scotland was awfy windy – mare than normal!!
Did we panic? Naw
Did we evacuate? Naw
Did we abandon Scotland? Naw
We just had oor tea early in case the lecky went oot!!!!!!
Americans get Katrina, Irene, Pauline and Andrew……… We get hurricane Bawbag!!!! You make take oor fences, you may take oor wheelie bins n trampolines but you’ll never take our banter!

This is my all time favourite


On December 8th 2011, a hurricane of biblical strength blasted across North and Central Scotland.
Victims can be seen wandering aimlessly muttering: “Ah wiz pure shittin’ masel big man so a wiz, ah need some jellies”.
The hurricane decimated the area, causing approximately £30 worth of damage. Untold disruption and distress was c…aused:

* Many were woken well before their giro arrived.
* Several priceless collections of mementos from the Balearics and Spanish costas were damaged.
* Three areas of historic and scientifically significant litter were disturbed.
* The cone fell off the head of the statue outside Glasgow’s Modern Art Gallery.
* Thousands are confused and bewildered, trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting has happened in Scotland.
* One resident, Pocahontis McGlinchy, a 17 year old mother-of-three said “Ah wiz like ‘Whit’s that? Ah,canny hear ma choonz innat man’ Wee Beyonce came running into my bedroom pure howlin so she wiz. My youngest two, Brooklyn an Blackpool slept through it. I was still pure rattlin when I was watching Jeremy Kyle the next morning.”
* Apparently though, looting did carry on as normal.
* The British Red Cross have so far managed to ship 4000 crates of Buckfast to the area to help the stricken masses.
* Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings including benefit books and jewellery from Elizabeth Duke at Argos.

Clothing is most sought after. Items required include:
– Sovvy rings
– Baseball caps
– Shell suits
– Tesco two stripe trainers
– White socks
– Chunky gold chains

Food parcels may be harder to put together but are necessary all the same. Required foodstuffs include:
– Mutty Pies and Buckfast
– Hauf Pizza Suppers and Buckfast
– Mars Bars and Buckfast
– Kebabs and Buckfast
– Haggis Suppers and Buckfast
– Fray Bentos Pies and Buckfast

* £2 buys chips, scraps and ginger for a family of four.
* £10 can take a family to Coatbridge for the day, where children can sniff glue and spike up among the national collection of stinging nettles.
* 22p buys a biro for filling in a spurious compensation claim

As for the picture, this is a classic case of not being prepared. I forgot my iPod, and phone, I even managed to leave the shoe  for the tripod at home forcing me to jam the camera under a piece of fence wire so I could take the photographs…. and I was the one that was thrown out of the Scouts for being over prepared! (I was actually in the Renfrew Town Sea Scouts and we had a hell of a time pitching our tents. They kept on sinking!)

If you were to look very closely you would see three outlines of the sun. I was amazed to see that it moved so much in the minute and a bit that it took to take the eight photos that went into this HDR image.

The day after Bawbag

* For those that don’t speak fluent Scots, a bawbag is the slang word for a scrotum. Now do you understand our sense of humour?


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